Romantic Music.............FOR FUCKIN’!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Music has always been a major factor in my life. My tastes go all over the place. As I write this, my iTunes is holding 5817 songs. I would go nuts without my iPod. Music helped me survive every second of my life. I'd shoot myself if I ever lost my hearing.

One Sunday on the way to the spiritual center, my wife told me to remind her to buy some Sade for her Nano. She wanted some sexy mood music. She pointed out that I never play music to get us into a seductive mood. I always thought that foreplay and seduction was what you did before you got married. After you put the ring on the sex was supposed to happen on que. I realized that Marta did not see the sarcastic humor in that statement when she whipped the car over, pinned me to the passenger window by my throat and stuck a .38 Smith & Wesson down my throat. She was about to pull the trigger until she realized that it was my turn to do dishes, make dinner and do laundry that day. That's right. Domestic work saved me from a written check that my mouth wrote that just bounced.

I never had mood music when I fooled around with women. Everything usually happened so fast that I never had time to set the cd player. You just made do with what was on at the time. I never created a mixed cd of songs that might put a woman in the mood because I never knew what might piss a woman off. The wrong song can remind a woman of a really bad relationship and then she's walking out pissed off. It can also be the other way around. I've had TONS of really boring and bad sex. There is such a thing. After a period of time, I'd just focus on what's in the background. I remember once having sex with a woman and really getiing into an episode of "Crossing Jordan" that was playing in the next room and being bummed that I didn't Tivo it.

I'm basically married now to someone that I could never live without. I've always felt that the music comes from the playful talking, laughter and sighs and moans of estacy and joy that we bring each other. That beats an iPod playlist anytime. But, I am going to work on the mood music thing.

By the way, I went out and bought "The Best Of Sade" for my wife. She was thrilled.